The Place I Belong
by DigiKouichi
Summary: Collection of oneshots that are connetcted. After the attack on Alexandria Dagger finds herself suffering from Insomnia, so she decides to play a silly little game.
1. Angel of Life

this is my first time writing a FF9 fanfic, so i apologize if Zidane and Dagger seem a bit OOC, i tried my best to keep them in character. that aside_,"The Place I Belong"_ will contain a series of oneshots that are connected but are each the own little story. anyway i was watching a FF9 walkthourgh (becouse i was unable to play FF9 for a while) when this idea came to me. in the game it seems he get's over the truth real quickly (it's not surprising when you considering the type of friends he has) but i think it would still bother him a bit. so i wrote this and of course i had to through Dagger in there! anyway please enjoy!

_**Disclaime**_**_r_: _Final Fantasy 9, its Characters, and its quots belong to_**_** Square Enix.**_

_**/Angel of Life**__**/  
**_

Zidane was tired, both physically and mentally. Learning the truth about his past was a shock. He felt like everything was a lie, however, thanks to his friends that feeling didn't last long. But the truth still left him feeling weak and all he wanted to do was go to sleep, and temporally forget everything that had happened that day. Alas, it seemed sleep would not come to him that night.

Sighing, he pushed the covers off himself and swung his legs over the side of the bed. Grabbing a piece of string form off the bed-side table, he used it to tie his long blonde hair back into a low pony tail. Then, after pulling on his faded-green boots, he stood up and quietly made his way to the door, making sure not to step on any of the squeaky floor boards. Reaching the door, he looked over his shoulder to make sure everyone else was still asleep. When he was sure that they were all fast asleep, he slowly opened the door and stepped out into the night. A gentle breeze blow his chin-length bangs out off his face, revealing greenish-blue eyes. Sighing, he looked around at his surroundings.

They were in the black mage village now, and everyone but Zidane was asleep. All that could be heard were the night bugs, the owl, and the wind. Sighing once again, Zidane made his way to the outskirts of the village and walked into the forest, his long blonde, monkey-like tail uncharacteristically dragging along the ground behind him. As he continued to walk deeper into the forest, the memories of his earlier conversations with Mikoto and Garland started to surface.

**/-/**

"_Garland watches over this planet. His mission is to restore the people of Terra."_

"_R-restore the people of Terra? You mean people besides these guys here?"_

"_They are merely vessels. So am I, and so are you. But the true people of Terra have been asleep for ages, waiting for their time to come."_

**/-/**

"_So, we meet again."_

"_Who are you!"_

"_Twelve years ago, I lost one of my most prized Genomes. I created him and sent him to Gaia to disrupt the cycle of souls there. You are that Genome… I am glad you have returned."_

"_Shut up!"_

**/-/**

Zidane shook his head, trying to clear it from the depressing memories. Looking behind him, he could barely see the lights from the Black mages village. Deciding that he had walked far enough, Zidane looked around for a nice spot to sit down. However, try as he might, the memories would not leave him alone.

**/-/**

"_Now, tell me everything."_

"_I constructed the Genomes to be the vessels for the souls of the people of Terra when they awaken. But 24 years ago, I gave life to a Genome that was very much like you…I sent that Genome as my servant, to disrupt the cycle of souls on Gaia."_

"_Yeah, so tell me who he is!"_

"_The one I sent to Gaia might also be called your brother…and his name is Kuja."_

**/-/**

His mind drifted to Kuja…to his so called brother. All the pain that Dagger had gone through was all caused by Kuja, by his brother. Shaking his head once more, Zidane gave up looking for a place to sit. There were too many twigs and rocks everywhere and he didn't feel like clearing out a space to sit. So turning his attention upward, he looked at the branches, seeing if there were any big enough to hold his weight. But his mind would still not rest, it continued to remember.

**/-/**

"_So…Kuja is just an angel of death who sends souls to the Tree of Iifa."_

"_Yes, my angel of death. But only until you came of age."_

"_What do you mean!"_

"_His soul is not eternal… I was going to create you next, after all."_

**/-/**

Finally finding a branch that looked big enough, he started to climb the tree. The branch was about fifteen feet from the ground, so it didn't take him long to reach it. Swinging himself onto the branch, another memory floated into his mind.

**/-/**

"_What about me! How did I end up on Gaia?"_

"_When you received the gift of life in Bran Bal, Kuja could not bear it. He could not bear to see a Genome with more power than his own; he felt threatened. Kuja discarded you. He dropped you onto Gaia, the world he would destroy."_

"_So I was to be your slave, just like Kuja, and start a war on Gaia?"_

"_That is correct."_

**/-/**

Zidane sat down on the branch, with his back against the tree trunk and his feet stretched out along the branch in front of him. As his tail hung limply off the branch, he crossed his legs together at the ankles. His hands twitched as he started to play with a small tear on the knee of his blue pants, as yet another memory appeared.

**/-/**

"_Will you not say farewell to your friends?"_

"_I don't care what I am… I was born here, wasn't I? If so, then I am an enemy of the people of Gaia."_

**/-/**

His face twisted in slight pain and annoyance.

_Why won't these stupid memories leave me alone!_ He shouted in his head.

_All I want is to go to sleep, and to forget this day ever happened! All I want…all I want__ed__… __was__ a place to call home… I know that place is with Tantalus and with my friends but…_

Zidane lifted his right hand and placed it over his heart. Gripping the material of his white sleeveless shirt, he choked back a sob.

_Why do I feel so alone?... I know I'm not but-_ his thoughts were interrupted when someone gently tugged on his tail and shouted up at him.

"I found you, Zidane!"

"Gah!" Zidane was so startled that he almost fell out of the tree. Using his quick reflexes he grabbed hold of a smaller branch next to himself and, after regaining his balance, looked down at the person holding his tail.

It was Dagger. She smiled up at him, as the wind blew her chin-length brown hair out of her face. Her long-sleeved white shirt was tucked into her orange overalls, both of which were covered in a thin layer of dirt. Her orange-red boots also had a decent amount of dirt on them. She closed her brown eyes as she laughed at the startled look on Zidane's face.

"Wh-what are you doing here!" he asked as he tried to move his tail out of her hands.

"I followed you." She replied, and before he could say anything else, she gave his tail another gentle tug and said, "Why don't you come down? We can sit next to each other."

"…no thanks. I think I'll stay up here…"

"Then, in that case," she let go of his tail and grabbed the closest branch to her. "I'll just have to join you up there." Using the first branch, she pulled herself up and grabbed another.

"What? Wait a minute, Dagger! the branches at the bottom aren't as strong as this one! If you grab the wrong one you-" and she indeed grabbed the wrong one. It was a small branch, as thick as her wrist, and as long as her body. It was also somewhat rotted, and a soon as she tried to use it to pull herself up, it broke.

"AH!" her grip lost, she fell.

"Dagger!" Zidane plunged forward and grabbed her hand in his right one. Reaching out with his left hand he grabbed hold of a thick branch, and wrapped his tail around the one he was just sitting on. Dagger dangled from his arm, a good eight feet from the ground.

"Phew…" she sighed in relief.

"Like I was saying… if you grabbed the wrong one you could break it and fall."

"Then you should come down and join me on the ground."

"…"

"Well?" she looked up at him.

"Fine… you win." Slowly, he set her down on the ground, and then climbed down himself.

She squatted down and started moving twigs and rocks out of the way. In no-time she cleared a small place for them to sit. She stood back up and turned around to sit down with her back against the tree trunk. She sat with her legs tucked under her towards her left.

"Here." She patted the ground on her right and smiled at him. "Sit here."

Sighing, Zidane did as the young queen told him and sat next to her, his back also leaning against the tree. Folding his legs together "Indian-style", he gave her a look that said 'happy now?' Dagger giggled as her smile became a bit bigger and to Zidane, a bit brighter.

After a few moments of silence Zidane turned to her and said,

"I thought you were asleep."

"I was, until I felt the bunk bed move." Zidane blinked.

"It moved?"

"Yes. It slightly sinks when someone sits on it, and then rises when they get off. I was half-asleep when you got up, so I felt it move. I was worried, so I followed you." She used her left hand as she talked, moving it slightly up and down as she explained the movement of the bunk bed.

"I… see." He was turning his head to look away when he caught a glimpse of the dirt on her sleeve. "How'd you get so dirty?" He asked.

"Oh. I...uh…tripped over a root… I thought you'd catch me there but you kept walking." She placed her hands together to form a triangle, as her face turned a deep shade of pink.

"Oh…I was…deep in thought…" he looked away and frowned. His mind was so stuck in those memories he didn't hear her. Then he realized something; His thoughts had been so depressing he had almost cried… _did Dagger see that?_

"How long were you standing underneath me?"

"Long enough." She closed her eyes, her face now serious.

_So she did see that…_ it was Zidane's turn to have his face become a deep shade of pink.

"What's wrong, Zidane? Are you…still upset about whatever happened in Terra?"

"…I can't hide anything from you can I?" Zidane ran his right hand through his hair and sighed.

"No, no you can't… tell me what happened Zidane? What did Makoto and Garland say to you?"

_That's right…I haven't told them everything yet…_

"I'd… rather not say, yet…" he bit his bottom lip.

"Why!"

"I'm…I'm not ready to tell you yet…it's not that I don't trust you or anything and I'm not trying to shoulder it all…I'm…just not ready to repeat what Garland said to me…I…I just need to rest…that's all…once I get some sleep I'll feel better."

Dagger sighed, "Then why are you all the way out here? If you want to sleep, why didn't you stay in bed? Sooner or later you'd ether fall asleep or pass out from exhaustion."

"…" Zidane looked down at his lap, his bangs hiding his face from Daggers view.

"Was it…because you felt like crying?" She saw Zidane's body tense up.

"I'm right, aren't I?" she gently placed her right hand under Zidane's' chin and turned his face towards her own. His face was a light pink and he wasn't looking her in the eyes.

"You know me too well…" he sighed for what seemed like the umpteenth time that night. "It's embarrassing… for a guy to be seen crying…"

"So you came out here so no one would see you?"

"Yeah…"

"Zidane…" she moved her hand from under his chin and brushed the bangs away from his face, before setting it on his left cheek. "It's okay if you want to cry, I don't see anything wrong with it. Even the strongest of us need to cry at some point."

His eyes widened in slight surprise, before once again looking away. Using his left hand he gently removed hers from his face and lowered it to the ground, but didn't let go. He remained silent for a while, and then finally managed to look Dagger in the eyes.

She stared at him in shock…his normally bright cheerful eyes were filled with pain and grief. She now understood why Zidane refused to have his eyes meet hers. He could lie with his voice but not his eyes. His eyes would reveal the truth.

_They say the eyes are the windows to the soul,_ she thought._ I guess it's true._

As she gazed into his eyes, she felt like her heart would break in two. It hurt her to see Zidane like this. The Zidane who was always cheerful was now filled with nothing but sadness.

"I…always wanted to know where I came from. Where I was born and why I was abandoned. But know that I know…I almost wish I didn't…" his words where so soft she had to strain her ears to hear him. He looked to the side as small tears began to form at the corners of his eyes. His grip on her hand tightened. _I don't want her to see me this weak but…_ slowly he leaned forward until his forehead was leaning against her right shoulder.

"Zidane…" Dagger placed her left hand around his shoulders and held him.

"He… called me his 'Angel of Death'…" Zidane whispered.

"Garland?"

"Yes…" he brought his free hand up and placed it on her left shoulder.

"I don't know what else he told you, Zidane but I know that, without a doubt, you are no 'Angel of Death'. You're an 'Angel of Life', Zidane. Not only have you saved the lives of many people, but you've brought joy and happiness to just as many. Including me… Ever since this journey began, you've stayed by my side… Whenever I needed someone to talk to, you would always lend me your ear. When I lost all hope, it was you who gave hope back to me. It was you who saved me. You took me by the hand , lead me through the darkness and into the light. You are not Terra's 'Angel of Death'; you are Gaia's 'Angel of Life'… MY 'Angel of life'…" She could feel Zidanes body shaking as he began to silently cry.

She could feel his tears drip onto her collarbone and then flow down into her shirt. They were warm and left a sticky feeling on her skin, but she didn't care.

_Zidane has always been there for me and now it's my turn to be there for him. I will hold him close and protect him from the darkness that is threatening his heart._ She gently squeezed his hand and then leaned her head on his.

As she held him, he wrapped his tail around her waist, moved his right hand under her left arm and placed it on the back of her right shoulder. With his tail firmly around her waist, he grabbed her shirt and held onto her.

"My… body's shaking so much…I feel like it'll fall apart…" he managed to say between sobs.

"Don't worry. I won't let that happen." Dagger tightened her grip on his shoulders.

"My heart… feels like it's been …smashed to pieces…"

"Then I'll pick up the pieces, put it back together, and never let anyone smash it again."

Zidane's eye widened when he heard this but they quickly closed again as a new flood of tears came. Feeling the increase in tears, Dagger did the one thing she knew would make Zidane feel better. She began to sing their song. As she sang, all the memories of Terra slowly faded away from Zidanes mind and in their place were the memories of all the times he and Dagger spent together.

The warmth of Dagger's body and the soft melody she was singing were slowly lullring Zidane to sleep. His eyes were becoming heavy and his strength was slipping away. He could feel his thoughts turning into dreams and before sleep over took him, he mumbled,

"Thank… you…Dag…ger…"

When he was asleep, the last of his tears fell and his body stopped trembling. Slowly and gently Dagger moved Zidane so that his head was on her lap. It was a bit difficult but she managed to do it. However, she wasn't able to unwrap his tail from her waist, when she tried to move it, it would only tighten around her.

_Maybe Zidane is subcon__sciously__ making sure that he's not alone?_ She giggled as she placed her left hand on his forehead.

"Don't worry Zidane, I'm not going anywhere. I'll stay by your side for as long as I can and no matter what is awaiting us in the future, I know you will remember this one thing; that you're not alone. I will always be in your heart and you will always be in mine."

Knowing that the Black Mages magic kept the dangerous beasts and monsters out of the forest, she allowed herself to fall asleep. When she awoke the next morning, Zidane was already awake. His face was slightly pink and he was stretching his arm up over his head. His tail was swinging back and forth, and Dagger had the urge to grab it again. Instead she settled for calling him.

"Good morning, Zidane. Did you sleep well?" She stretched her legs out in front of her, and stretched her arms up, mimicking Zidane. Slightly startled, he turned around, his face become more red then pink.

"y-yeah… sorry about last night…" he looked at the ground and used his right hand to rub the back of his head in embarrassment.

"There's no need to apologize. Are you feeling better?" Dagger stood up and started walking towards the village.

"Of course! How can I not feel better after being held by someone so beautiful?" He winked at her and grinned. She blushed slightly and sped up her pace. He laughed a bit then ran after her. When he reached her he placed his right hand on her left shoulder and slightly turned her towards him. It was then that she noticed that his eyes were red and puffy from all of his crying the night before.

"Sorry, couldn't help it. But I am feeling a lot better." He looked her straight in the eyes. "Thank you for being there, Dagger. I really mean it."

Dagger smiled and with her left hand she took his off her shoulder and held it.

"I'll always be here for you. Although you seldom fall, I will be there when you do. I will pick you back up and push you forward, just as you've always do with me. And don't forget, you're an Angel of Life, not of death."

Zidane smiled and Dagger could see tears in the corners of his eyes.

_If I'm an Angel of life,_ Zidane thought,_ then Dagger is the Goddess of life._

"Thank you."

Dagger smiled and then together they walked back to the village. They didn't know what awaited them but whatever it was, they would face it together.

**/until the next/**

i hope you all enjoyed it! please REVIEW and tell me what you think. if you see something that could use improving(like if i need to work on describing sertenthing better) then please let me know...just...be nice about, 'kay? as for the rest of the oneshots they will be uploaded when ever i finish typing them and have my friend proffread them. it could be anything from a week to a month... well bye bye for know remember to REVIEW please!


	2. Insomnia

A/N

So after who knows how long, I finally typed this up! The idea's been floating in my head for mouths now… lol I have a hard time sitting down to write but when I do start writing I don't stop till I'm done!

Anyway this takes place a few days after Kuja attacked Alexandria. Please read, enjoy, and review!

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Final Fantasy 9 or its characters!

* * *

**Insomnia**

In the middle of the forest, Garnet til Alexandros XVII, also known as Dagger, was lying on her back, staring at the countless stars above her. The teen queen lay on top of a blue blanket with her long dark-brown hair sprawled out behind her. Her white shirt and sleeveless orange jumpsuit were her only protection from the cold night. She had kicked the other, darker blue blanket off her earlier.

It was well past the time where most Gaians were asleep and just like the past few nights, she found herself unable to sleep. Every night since the attack on Alexandria she found that, not only could she not speak, she couldn't sleep ether. Every night when she closed her eyes to sleep, she saw the destruction of her kingdom.

Unable to sleep she stayed awake, haunted by the memories of her burning kingdom, until she passed out from lack of sleep. She sighed and turned her brown eyes to Zidane, the person lying only four feet away from her. He was a teen boy with medium-long blond hair that was tied back into a low ponytail. He wore a white sleeveless shirt and blue Jodhpur pants. He lay on his side with his back to her.

She stared at him, studying his figure. His hair was layered and his back strong but the thing that always caught her attention was his blond monkey-like tail. Even when he was asleep it never stayed still, slowly moving back and forth, occasionally twitching. She gazed at it curiously; she had always wanted to touch it and she still did…

Slowly an idea started to form in her head, a silly idea, but a fun idea nonetheless. As quietly as she could she sat up and crawled over to Zidane. Looking around the camp site to make sure no one else was awake she began her new game. The game she had just made up was very simple: try and poke Zidane without waking him up. It was indeed very silly, but it was keeping her mind off of things, so very slowly she poked Zidane's arm. His arm twitched and she jumped back to her makeshift bed as fast as she could.

A moment of silence past, and she inched over to Zidane again and poked his arm again; this time it didn't twitch. She kept her finger there for a moment, and then poked his lower back. Once again she felt him twitch but he didn't wake, so she kept her little game going. She poked his neck, then his nose, and finally his hand. Each time he would twitch a little but still he never woke up.

She looked at him, trying to think of where to poke him next. His tail suddenly swished past her leg and she slightly jumped in surprise. She stared at his tail and a mischievous smiled spread across her face. She found her next target.

Slowly she tried to poke his tail, only to have it move at the last second. She tried again, and again his tail moved before she could poke it. Again and again she tried to poke it, and again and again it would move out of the way. She puffed out her cheeks in slight annoyance; she was determined to catch his tail! She watched the tail move, timing its movements. Then moving her right hand as fast as she could, she snatched up Zidane's tail. Holding his tail in her hand she inwardly cheered until realization dawned on her. Zidane's tail was in her hand, and not only was she gripping in with all her strength but she was pulling on it as well. She froze, waiting for him to wake up…

Minutes passed but he didn't move. His tail still swished back and forth, lightly hitting Dagger's right arm, but besides that the only other movements coming from him was his chest, slowly moving as he breathed. She sighed in relief and relaxed her grip on his tail. She stared at it in amazement. The fur was thick but soft and the muscles were strong. She remembered the time Zidane used his tail to escape Steiner; he wrapped it around a pipe and hung there just out of Steiner's reach.

She used her left hand to rub his tail; she couldn't get over how soft it was! Then, without warning, his tail moved, wrapping itself around her right arm and not letting go. Panicking she looked over at Zidane while trying to pry his tail of her arm. He was still fast asleep and the more she struggled the tighter his tail squeezed her arm. Not knowing what else to do, she stayed still. Slowly his tail loosened its grip, and began to unravel itself.

Finally his tail was loose enough for Dagger to pull her arm free, so as slowly as she could, she moved Zidane's tail off her arm and back onto the ground. She sat there staring at his tail, thinking over everything that just happened. When she imagined how funny she must have looked while panicked, she started to silently laugh. Then she suddenly found herself tired, so she moved back to her makeshift bed and lay down, thinking about how silly she was being. Without realizing it, she laughed herself to sleep.

A few minutes after she fell asleep, Zidane opened his eye and sat up. He gave Dagger a very amused look and moved over to her side. He picked up the dark blue blanket and covered her with it, pulling it up to her chin and tucking her in. He leaned in and kissed her forehead.

"Good night Dagger." He moved back to his makeshift bed, and then lay back down, this time facing Dagger. "Maybe next time you can ask me before you start playing with my tail?" he laughed, then soon fell back to sleep.

* * *

A/N

So what do you think? Once again I tried to keep them in character, but they might have been a little OOC… oh well, please review and tell me what you think, it you see an area in my writing I have to improve in please tell me! I appreciate advice and constructive criticism. But don't be mean about it please, all flames will be given to Ifrit.


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